You could pay $1,395 to attend a workshop (like this one) to learn how to get rich in the education industry, but Momma Bears already did the homework and figured it all out. And Momma Bears is all about sharing knowledge with other concerned folks. So, save your money and read about the easy 10-step program to getting rich with other people's money through America's public school system...
10 steps to hitting the jackpot in education:
Step #2: Create a catchy name for your organization. Acronyms work especially well. Don't forget a logo. You cannot go wrong with an apple logo, they are very much in style right now.
Step #3: Make a website with pretty pie charts and lots of catchy buzz-words like these:
- achievement gap
- data driven benchmarks
- human capital
- Common Core aligned
- education strategies
- global citizen
- rigorous, relevant, and robust
Step #4: Convince a school district that they are failing. You'll need to cherry-pick and manipulate test score data, make some glitzy charts, and use lots of buzz words. It helps if you can WOW the school board members and Superintendent with free trips or fancy meals, too.
Step #5: Find a Gullible Billionaire. (Bill Gates, Eli Broad, or any of the Walton family love education entrepreneurs, especially if you have a great logo.)
Step #6: Convince that failing school district to apply for a grant from the Gullible Billionaire. Note: the Gullible Billionaire may require a "matching grant" to get his money. Don't fret your pretty little entrepreneurial heart over that little detail! There's money to be squeezed from within that school district (those students don't need money for library, art, or music, do they?) Don't forget to tell the school district to ask for matching grants from that town's Chamber of Commerce and other gullible rich people. Businesses love to donate if you publicize their names; it is well-known that customers especially love businesses that help children. Be sure to check all those potential sources of grant money.
***Disclaimer: the Billionaire will require private student data in exchange for his grant. Don't worry, you won't go to jail. The Family Educational Rights and Privacy Act (FERPA) law was quietly changed to make it all legal. Parents would be upset if they knew, though, so don't let them find out.
Step #7: Name your price (which is conveniently the same amount as their grant funds plus the money they squeezed from their tight budget). Set a time limit to your involvement with the district, and include in the contract that you get paid no matter what.
Step #8: Pretend to study the data from the district. Visit some of their schools to seem legitimate. Then, convince the elected school board and superintendent to do any or all of the following (it really doesn't matter to you what they do, of course, because you still get paid regardless):
- Fire teachers.
- Hire unqualified temporary teachers that cost less and don't stay around long enough to get pricey retirement benefits.
- Tell teachers they can earn bonuses and/or merit pay for reaching impossible goals.
- Spend more money on testing students (but call them "benchmark assessments" to compile even more data, which Gullible Billionaires love).
- Suggest they give biased surveys to teachers, parents, & students to convince them that you know what you are doing (these surveys are a great way to gather even more data. In fact, some Gullible Billionaires will often pay 100% for the surveys in addition to the grant!)
- Squeeze even more students into classrooms to save their school district money (but don't ever mention how much they are wasting on outside consultants like yourself!)
- Close neighborhood schools and give them to charter school investors.
Step #9: Now that you have stirred up a hornet's nest in that school district, it is time to get out of Dodge, cowboy! The citizens are starting to see they've been duped. It is time to go on a nice vacation or buy yourself a yacht with those millions of education dollars filling up your bank account.
Step #10: If you really want to rake in consistent long-term tax-payer money, consider starting charter schools. Charter operators set their own salaries and you don't have to deal with pesky financial audits and laws that apply to public schools. Charter investors get ridiculous tax breaks up to 38%, which will double your money in just 7 years! Yes, sir-ee, just sit back and let some commoners run your charter school empire while you watch your bank account grow.
So there you have it. Ten easy steps to hitting the jackpot in the education industry. What is your next goal in life? Perhaps children of your own? If you decide to brave the parenthood frontier, just make sure you put your own children in nice private schools with small class sizes, rich art programs, qualified teachers, huge endowments, and none of that common core stuff that some other education entrepreneurs came up with to sell textbooks & testing and gather data for Gullible Billionaires. Hey, maybe you'll see their yacht when you're on vacation so you can ask them for private school recommendations???
Click these links to see for yourself:
- Click HERE to read about grants & consultants in Knox County, TN
- Click HERE to read about the enormous profit in Memphis, TN
- Click HERE and HERE to see how TN's Governor profits
- Click HERE to read how charters & testing companies make millions in TN
- Click HERE to read about the scandals in FL, OK, ME, NJ, TN, NM, & LA
- Click HERE to read the waste in Denver, CO
- Click HERE and HERE to read how this firm profited from chaos in Colorado, New Orleans, New York, & St. Louis
- Click HERE to read how a smart teacher does the math on Charter Schools
- Click HERE and HERE to heed other's warnings about the Boston Consulting Group
- Click HERE to see how Texas is being swindled big-time
- Click HERE to see Louisana being taken advantage of
- Click HERE for No Consultant Left Behind
- Click HERE to see how a billionaire advertised for paid consultants in 15 states through Race to the Top
- Click HERE to see how a consultant gets paid $625 an hour in Florida with public tax dollars (even though teachers haven't received raises in 7 years and the school board cut sports and student activities).